Monday, February 6, 2012

The Battle of "You never know..."

Infertility is a tricky thing. 
Often there are very few known factors. 
If you're one of the lucky ones, the doctor was able to pinpoint the problem and 
deliver a neat and tidy diagnosis.
If you're part of the majority, you're given a list of factors contributing to your infertility. 
While any information is great it still leaves room for a whole lot of questions.

Then there's the confusion of the general public about infertility. 
From many well-meaning folks you'll get the infamous "Just relax" and
"Maybe it's just not the right time."

But probably the worst is the "You never know..."

Oh you never do know
Know for certain.
You're never 100% positive that you'll never, ever get pregnant.
You may be 98% sure.
Or even 99% sure.
Or even 99.9999999% sure.
But there's always that small % that whispers "you never know..."

Our lives are filled with "you never know".
You never know if your car will break down. 
So you save extra $ in the bank.
You never know if your baby will have a blowout in the grocery store, 
so you pack extra clothes and wipes in your diaper bag. 
You never know if the world will end tomorrow, 
so you store massive amounts food in your basement.

While it's great to be prepared, 
if you constantly live in a state of
"you never know"
then what are you missing that you do know?

You're missing on life.

So many well meaning people have told me "you never know".
But if I told myself that every month I'd go crazy. 
I'd completely miss out on the joy of what I do know now,
worrying about what I don't know in the future.

Talk about sucking the life out of life, right?
I'll pass.

My friends Jewls recently blogged this which perfectly illustrates how I feel about all this.
Sometimes you do just need to know in order to quiet that little voice and move on.

I do know that Gavin and I will evaluate prayerfully our options as we move forward.
If that leads to us getting pregnant, great! 
There'll be a party and you'll all be invited!
If not and our baby comes through a different path, great!
There'll be a party and you'll all be invited!

There are a lot of unknowns ahead and it's exciting.
Maybe we'll find out answers.
Maybe we won't.
Either way, "you never know" can drive you crazy or
it can symbolize the exciting future that surely lies ahead!


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